Does one marry for independence? For displaying their personality? Mrs. Dalloway declares the importance of marriage as “a little license, a little independence there must be between people living together day in day out in the same house; which Richard gave her, and she him,” (7). This relationship with Richard, as expressed by Mrs. Dalloway, is a successful one due to the personal space each spouse has allotted for the other.
While Peter does seem to be a precious individual to Clarissa, it could be argued that, according to Clarissa, he would contribute to her lack of individuality had they gotten married due to his constant interference in her life. But even with her marriage to Richard, Clarissa seems to convey a conflict of individuality.
It could be evident that intervals of loneliness is what keeps Mrs. Dalloway moving. During the party, Mrs. Dalloway was required to play a perfect hostess by greeting and interacting with guests whether she admired their company or not. However, the minute she disappears from the havoc of the evening, Mrs. Dalloway submerges in the afterthoughts of a suicide to deeply think about her own self: Clarissa.
Suicide, in this event, demonstrates a person’s madness. Clarissa’s thoughts might not have veered in this direction, but it is clearly supported how death made her rethink her previous events and actions that made her who she is. In the same instance, she mentioned Bourton where she met Richard and everyone was well aware of Peter Walsh’s love towards Clarissa. Consequently, she contemplates how this moment, in the emptiness of the room, could never be achieved had she wed Peter Walsh because “everything had to be shared; everything gone into,” (7).
But even while feeling independent of her spouse, Clarissa walks down Bond Street repeatedly claiming:
She would not say of any one in the world now that they were this or were that. She felt bery young; at the same time unspeakably aged. (8)
Throughout the book, Clarissa’s conflict of interest based on what to feel contributes to her own confusion. While Clarissa believes Richard and herself conform to a public identity of Mr. and Mrs. Richard Dalloway, Woolf gives presence to the insecurity Clarissa subtly communicates to us readers. Overall, Clarissa seems to cover her ambiguous personality with reasons that hint at her lack of self-identity.
This is one of the paradoxes of the novel, and you articulate it well here. One would think that Peter's more unconventional approach to life would have led to more freedom and independence and self-definition on Clarissa's part, while "Mrs. Richard Dalloway" is a confining, "perfect hostess" kind of role. But in Clarissa's own account (which makes sense, given what we see of Peter), she and Richard have an understanding, and give each other the necessary space, while Peter would always be in her face, wanting to talk about everything, criticizing everything, always unsatisfied. Their two visits to her at home can be used to compare the dynamics: the visit with Peter makes her self-conscious, self-critical, critical of him, defensive, and so on, while with Richard she's at ease, chatting easily about their days so far, and calmly acquiescing to his request that she follow doctors' orders and get some rest.
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